today is my sweet baby's one month birthday. Aj is so precious and
gorgeous and... i just want to stare at him and kiss his little
cheeks all day long. this month has flown by, and i only hear the
years go faster and faster. sad. how do i remember all these
moments?
i feel like i can not even put into words all my thoughts and feelings
on this whole motherhood thing. maybe i still have hormone
levels out of whack, but i can not grasp my emotions.
people ask me "isn't it just the greatest thing", and "aren't
you just so happy". yes and yes, but no and no. this stuff is
hard. and it is even harder when you get started off by
having to put your baby into the NICU. your self-confidence
goes into the toilet. all the knowledge from those great books
you read make no sense.
my entire life has changed for the better and i would not want
anything different. i am just filled with this new love that takes
my breath away and knocks me down. trying to get back up
is the part where i need to make sense of the thoughts and
feelings. and that is where i am trying to run to my heavenly
father and ask Him to pick me back up and give me the
confidence I need in Him to be the best mother and wife i can
be.
this is the summary of my first month. pray next month comes
with hormone levels back to normal.
happy birthday sweet Aj.
gorgeous and... i just want to stare at him and kiss his little
cheeks all day long. this month has flown by, and i only hear the
years go faster and faster. sad. how do i remember all these
moments?
i feel like i can not even put into words all my thoughts and feelings
on this whole motherhood thing. maybe i still have hormone
levels out of whack, but i can not grasp my emotions.
people ask me "isn't it just the greatest thing", and "aren't
you just so happy". yes and yes, but no and no. this stuff is
hard. and it is even harder when you get started off by
having to put your baby into the NICU. your self-confidence
goes into the toilet. all the knowledge from those great books
you read make no sense.
my entire life has changed for the better and i would not want
anything different. i am just filled with this new love that takes
my breath away and knocks me down. trying to get back up
is the part where i need to make sense of the thoughts and
feelings. and that is where i am trying to run to my heavenly
father and ask Him to pick me back up and give me the
confidence I need in Him to be the best mother and wife i can
be.
this is the summary of my first month. pray next month comes
with hormone levels back to normal.
happy birthday sweet Aj.
2 comments:
true words...spoken straight from the heart! it's so true, parenting is a hard job. thankfully we have a Heavenly Father who give's us the wisdom and strength to keep going, even in the midst of the most trying moments! Aj is amazing...and you are a wonderful mother! Happy 1 month to you all...
xoxo
happy one month old aj!
& erin, i will pray your sweet mommy emotions come together for you. everything can seem so overwhelming. you are a great mommy & wife, i'm sure!
xo
Post a Comment